Philippines Getaway: Sauna, Buffet, Balcony & Space for 4 Groups!
Philippines Getaway: My Brain Dump & You Should Go! (Seriously)
Okay, so I spent a weekend at this place called "Philippines Getaway: Sauna, Buffet, Balcony & Space for 4 Groups!" and honestly? My brain is still kinda processing it. There's a LOT going on. And that's… mostly a good thing. Here's the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth (or at least, my very subjective version of it).
The Big Sell: Why You Need This in Your Life (Right Now)
Forget the generic tropical escape ads. This isn't just some postcard-perfect beach. This is more like a… well, imagine four friend groups, each with their own quirks and demands, all converging in one place and somehow, mostly getting along. It's chaotic, it's comfy, it's got a sauna, and the food… oh, the food. More on that delicious, buffet-fueled experience later. Bottom line? If you're looking for a place to reconnect with friends, family, or even just your own sanity (and you like saunas!), this place is worth a serious look. Consider it your escape hatch from the mundane.
Accessibility: The Ups and Downs (Because Life's Never Perfect)
Okay, let's rip the band-aid off. Accessibility isn't perfect. While the hotel does have facilities for disabled guests (hello, elevator!), the details are vague. I didn't see specific ramps or super-wide doorways, so double-check with the hotel directly if this is a major concern. I did see the staff helping out a guest with a mobility issue, though. It's a start, but not exactly a shining beacon of inclusiveness. They could improve things, and hopefully, they will.
Stuff that Matters: Location, Location, Location (and Connectivity!)
- Internet Access: YES! Free Wi-Fi in the rooms! And Wi-Fi in public areas. So, you can Instagram your buffet-fueled antics from the comfort of your balcony. Bliss. They also have internet [LAN] if you're old-school or just super serious about your work.
- Rooms and Amenities: Let’s do a quick fire round here, shall we? Air conditioning (praise the heavens!), all the usual suspects like a mini-bar (yay!), and crucially, a window that opens. Because sometimes, you just need fresh air, even if it’s just to air out the after-sauna smell. They even have interconnecting rooms, which is great for large groups. I didn't use the additional toilet, but hey, good to know it's a thing!
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (And My Personal Breakdown)
- Sauna: Okay, let's talk about the real reason to book. The sauna. I spent a solid hour in there, sweating out the stress, the deadlines, and maybe a little too much of that buffet. Pure bliss. It’s not the fanciest sauna, but it's hot, it's relaxing, and it's a damn good way to start or end the day. Side note: Make sure you drink plenty of water! I learned that the hard way and felt a little faint on the way out.
- Swimming Pool: The swimming pool area is beautiful, with a view! Perfect for splashing or just lounging around.
- Spa/Spa Sauna: While I didn't have a full spa day, the options were there (massage, body wrap, etc.) Could’ve used that body scrub after the buffet. You know, just a thought.
- Fitness Center: Seriously, hit the gym before you hit the buffet. Just saying.
Food, Glorious Food (and My Buffet Strategy)
- Buffet: This is where things get interesting. They absolutely nail the buffet. Asian breakfast, international cuisine – it’s all there. I'm talking mountains of food. My personal strategy? Smaller portions, more trips. That way, you can sample everything. I’m pretty sure I tried every single dessert. Twice. (Don’t judge me.)
- Restaurants, Bars, & Coffee/Tea: They had multiple restaurants, a coffee shop, a poolside bar (hello, happy hour!), and a bar. You can always order room service (24-hour!) if you're too lazy to move. I didn't eat the salad in restaurant, maybe I will try! It's got everything – soups, desserts, coffee, tea. So many options.
- Extras: Bottle of water? Check. Complimentary tea? Check. Essential condiments? They're on it.
Cleanliness and Safety: Peace of Mind in the Pandemic Era
- Cleanliness is paramount: They’re taking it seriously. Hand sanitizer everywhere, staff trained in safety protocols, and rooms sanitized between stays. They even have anti-viral cleaning products. And the buffet setup is designed to be safe. Plenty of safe dining setup. So, you don’t have to worry too much. (But of course, still wash your hands!)
- Details: There is also a doctor/nurse on call, a first aid kit, and safe dining setup.
Services and Conveniences: Little Things That Make a Big Difference
They offer a lot of services that makes the stay easier.
- Business facilities They have business facilities, invoice provided, meeting rooms, Xerox/fax!
- Things like laundry service, luggage storage, and even a concierge.
- Daily housekeeping: That's a lifesaver, especially after you spend the night in the sauna!
- Cash withdrawal They have contactless check-in and check-out
For the Kids: Family-Friendly Fun
They claim to be family/child friendly. I didn’t see tons of kids running around, but they do have kids facilities, so you can relax.
- Babysitting service: I don’t see it here, but is stated.
Getting Around: Easy Peasy
- They offer airport transfer (thank you!) and a taxi service. Free on-site parking means you can even bring your own car.
The Quirky Stuff (The Stuff I Loved Even More)
- The Balcony Life: My room had a balcony. And that balcony was my sanctuary. Coffee in the morning, sunset cocktails in the evening – it was perfect.
- The Vibe: This place isn't pretentious. It's relaxed, it’s comfortable, and it’s not trying to be something it's not. It’s just… easy.
- The Staff: They are genuinely friendly and helpful. From front desk to room service, everyone was genuinely nice.
The Imperfections (Because Nothing's Perfect)
- As mentioned earlier, accessibility could be better.
- The hallways had a bit of an exterior corridor vibe and felt a little dated.
Final Verdict and a Call to Action
Look, I’m not going to lie. This place isn't perfect. But it's good. It's fun. It's a great place to de-stress, recharge, and reconnect. And that sauna? Seriously, book it for the sauna alone.
Here's My Offer to You:
Book your "Philippines Getaway" by [Date] and get a FREE upgrade to a room with a balcony and a complimentary bottle of wine upon arrival! We're also throwing in a coupon for a discounted spa treatment like that body scrub you know you secretly want!
Use code "SAUNA-BLISS" at checkout to claim your offer.
Go on, treat yourself. You deserve it. And bring your friends.
Escape to Paradise: The Gateway Inn Australia Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to blast off on a trip to the Philippines… but not the sterile, pre-packaged kind. This is real life travel, people. Expect jet lag, questionable food choices, and a whole heap of "what were we thinking?" moments. This is the itinerary, but mostly, it’s just my sanity-preserving journal.
The Amazing Space with Sauna, Buffet, Balcony Extravaganza – Philippines Edition (4 Groups, Mayhem Guaranteed!)
Phase 1: The Pre-Flight Freakout & Manila Meltdown (Days 1-2)
Day 1: Pre-Departure Panic & Airport Acrobatics
- 6:00 AM: Alarm clock mocks me. My eyes are still glued shut; the bags aren't packed, and I haven't even showered because I'm too frozen in panic. Did I remember the passport? The anxiety sweats are already kicking in. Great start.
- Anecdote: Tried to print my e-ticket… printer jammed. Cue a full-blown meltdown involving paper, ink, and a rapidly dwindling sense of hope. My partner, bless his soul, just calmly bought a new printer. I may or may not have kissed the ground when we finally got the ticket printed.
- 9:00 AM: Airport bound. The car is overflowing with luggage, last-minute shopping bags filled with "essentials" (read: overpriced snacks). Praying to the travel gods for smooth check-in.
- 11:00 AM: After all the panic, we're at the airport! Check-in was surprisingly smooth… until we discovered someone (me) forgot to weigh their carry-on. Sigh. Fine, I will get rid of my bag of chips.
- Quirky Observation: The airport is a symphony of stressed-out sighs, crying babies, and the faint aroma of desperation. Beautiful.
- 3:00 PM: On the plane! Finally. Takeoff feels like… well, like a rocket ship lifting off, which I might be on with the "Amazing Space" theme. So I give it everything I got and get the travel pillow.
- 12:00 AM (Day 2): Landing in Manila. Welcome to the humidity! Everything is sticky, even my eyeballs. The airport is a chaotic dance of bodies, luggage, and the unending quest for a functioning restroom.
- Emotional Reaction: Exhilaration! And also a deep and profound weariness. My brain feels like it's been put through a blender.
- 1:00 AM: Check into the hotel, collapse on the bed, and swear never to travel again… until tomorrow.
- 6:00 AM: Alarm clock mocks me. My eyes are still glued shut; the bags aren't packed, and I haven't even showered because I'm too frozen in panic. Did I remember the passport? The anxiety sweats are already kicking in. Great start.
Day 2: Manila Misfits & Cultural Confusion
- 9:00 AM: The buffet breakfast. Oh, the buffet breakfast! It's the only thing that makes the jetlag a bit bearable. Omelets, pastries, and enough coffee to revive Frankenstein's monster.
- Anecdote: Tried a local fruit I'm pretty sure was meant to be used in some bio-hazard experiment. It tasted… interesting. (Code for "unpleasant").
- 11:00 AM: City tour of Manila. Intramuros next. The Walled City is stunning. I am not sure if my legs can handle it though.
- Opinionated Language: Manila is a vibrant, chaotic, and sometimes overwhelming city. But it's also full of heart, history, and hidden gems. (Just be careful crossing the street. It's a contact sport.)
- 2:00 PM: Luncheon. I have no idea what's being served. My stomach seems to have a mind of its own.
- 4:00 PM: Shopping. Got stuck in traffic. This is my life now.
- Quirky Observation: The jeepneys (vibrant public transport) are the most gloriously chaotic things I've ever seen. I have no idea how they work, but they do.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner and cultural show. Lechon, dancing, and a general feeling of being utterly, gloriously overwhelmed.
- Emotional Reaction: A wave of affection for the Philippines is growing inside me. This place is bonkers, but in a good way.
- 9:00 AM: The buffet breakfast. Oh, the buffet breakfast! It's the only thing that makes the jetlag a bit bearable. Omelets, pastries, and enough coffee to revive Frankenstein's monster.
Phase 2: Island Hopping & Sauna Secrets (Days 3-6)
Day 3: Boracay Bound! (and the Sauna Dream begins)
- 7:00 AM: Wake up to the sound of (hopefully) less chaos.
- 9:00 AM: Flight to Boracay. Another airport, another adventure.
- 11:00 AM: Land at Caticlan Airport.
- Anecdote: The airport runway is basically kissing distance to the sea. It's like landing on a postcard.
- 11:30 AM: Boat to Boracay Island. White sand beaches, emerald waters…this is what paradise looks like, right?
- 12:00 PM: Check into our Amazing Space - THE SAUNA ROOM!
- Opinionated Language: The "Amazing Space" sounds like a hotel room name, and I'm here for it. Especially the sauna. I've been dreaming of a hot, steamy, muscle-melting experience all day.
- 2:00 PM: Beach time. Sun, sand, and the sweet, sweet sound of the sea.
- Emotional Reaction: Pure bliss. Just… sigh. This is what I needed.
- 6:00 PM: Dinner on the beach. Fresh seafood, sunset views… and the distinct feeling of being slightly sunburned. Worth it.
Day 4: SAUNA EXTRAVAGANZA
- 9:00 AM: Okay, deep breath, I did not come here just for the beach. SAUNA TIME! I'm talking full-on, ritualistic sauna experience.
- 10:00 AM: After the sauna, I will drink the ice-cold water.
- Anecdote: We'll go to the Sauna and enjoy a complete bliss.
- 11:00 AM - 5:00 PM: SAUNA AGAIN! And AGAIN! I didn't come here for the beach, I came here to become one with the steam.
- Emotional Reaction: This sauna is a religious experience.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner, and I am planning to return for the sauna at the end of the day.
Day 5: Island Hopping & Buffet Battle
- 9:00 AM: Island hopping tour! It's all about seeing other islands.
- 12:00 PM: Lunch at another island. I'll just stick to the food at this buffet. I don't think I can eat anything else.
- Anecdote: Found a hidden beach with a swing. Took approximately 500 pictures of myself looking "effortlessly cool." Failed miserably.
- 2:00 PM: More island hopping, more turquoise waters. I'm starting to think this is a dream.
- 6:00 PM: Sunset drinks with a view. (And maybe a little celebratory dance on the sand.)
- 7:00 PM: Is the buffet open?
Day 6: Balcony Breakfast & Last-Minute Souvenir Scramble
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast on our balcony. This feeling is amazing.
- 10:00 AM: Last-minute souvenir shopping. Why is it so hard to find a decent fridge magnet?
- 12:00 PM: Lunch. The buffet's call is strong.
- 2:00 PM: Beach one last time. Soak it all in.
- 4:00 PM: Pack. That is the hardest part.
- 6:00 PM: Farewell dinner. Teary goodbyes to the island.
Phase 3: Departure Disaster & Reality Recon (Days 7-8)
Day 7: Heading Home (With A Side of Anxiety)
- 7:00 AM: Early flight back to Manila. The dreaded goodbyes await.
- 10:00 AM: Arrival in Manila. This is where the real test begins.
- 12:00 PM: Waiting in the airport. This is my last memory of the Philippines.
- 4:00 PM: Take off!
Day 8: The Aftermath
- 12:00 AM (Day 8): Landing. Back to reality. Sleep.
- 10:00 AM: Wake up, start to wash the laundry.
- Every hour: I will forever miss the sauna.
Overall Thoughts:
This trip was
Escape to Paradise: Uncover the Secrets of The Mourya Inn, India
Philippines Getaway: Sauna, Buffet, Balcony & Space for 4 Groups! - (Frequently Asked, Sometimes Frustrating, But Ultimately Wonderful Questions)
Is this place *really* big enough for four groups? Seriously?
Alright, the million-dollar question! YES, technically. *Maybe*. Okay, let's be honest: It *felt* like it when we booked. The brochure photos... pristine, perfectly posed groups of happy people, all having simultaneous conversations on the balcony, clearly not bumping into each other or fighting over the last lumpia. In *reality*...? Well, remember that scene in "Cats" where all the cats are just... *there*? That, with more luggage and slightly less interpretive dance.
We had two families, a couple of college friends, and my perpetually-hangry in-laws. Space wise? There were enough bedrooms. But the "communal areas"... Let's just say the buffet table occasionally became a battleground. Especially during breakfast. Someone always "accidentally" took the last piece of longganisa. My advice? Establish early territorial lines. And maybe pack extra snacks. Seriously. Always.
The Buffet. Is it... good? Like, REALLY good? Or just... "buffet good?"
Okay, the buffet. Ah, the buffet. It's a roller coaster, my friends. One minute you're happily devouring lechon, the next you're staring glassy-eyed at mystery meat, wondering what glorious animal gave its life for the cause.
The quality fluctuates. We hit a home run with the fresh fruit one morning – mangoes so sweet they made me weep (okay, maybe just tear up a little). Then, the next day, *BAM*, the adobo was... well, let's just say it had a strong "vinegar-forward" approach. My mother-in-law (the picky eater) spent the entire week living on the plain white rice. She still talks about it.
So, is it REALLY good? Depends on the day. Is it "buffet good"? Absolutely. Is it an adventure? You bet your lumpia it is. Go in with realistic expectations, strategically choose your food (the fruit, always the fruit!), and embrace the chaos. And ALWAYS check the temperature of the coffee... trust me.
Tell me about the balcony. Is the view Instagrammable? (Important question, obviously.)
The balcony is... a mixed bag. The view? Potentially Instagram-worthy. It really depends on the location and the time of day. We had a partial ocean view which was stunning at sunset. Pure magic. Worth it! Definitely a "post-worthy" moment (and I have the photographic evidence to prove it).
But... Here's the thing. The balcony was also where my teenage niece and her friends discovered the joys of playing loud music at 3 AM. And where my brother-in-law, bless his heart, decided to "experiment" with grilling. Let me tell you, burnt fish at sunrise is not the aroma you want wafting into your bedroom. So, Instagrammable? Yes. Peaceful? Possibly. Potentially a scene of utter family drama? Almost certainly.
Bring earplugs. And maybe a fire extinguisher. Just in case.
The sauna! Is it a proper sauna? Or just a glorified… warm closet?
THE SAUNA. This is where things got... interesting. I was SO excited. Visions of myself, glistening and relaxed, emerging from a wood-paneled paradise. The reality? Well… it was a sauna. Technically.
It was… *functional*. It got hot. Eventually. The rocks were… rocks. The ambient lighting was… dim. But the main issue? It was crammed in the lower back of the property. The location was less "tranquil spa" and more "conveniently out of the way of the main house." Getting to it felt like a treasure hunt! The amount of time it took reaching the sauna and getting hot was way less than it feels.
Then *that* happened. I was in it with my wife and her best friend, and the door got stuck! Locked us in. It was a little cramped. My wife started trying to pry it from the inside. Her friend kept trying to call someone from her cellphone. I started laughing nervously. It was a good five minutes before we were released, but it was pure, unadulterated, hysterical chaos.
So, is it a proper sauna? Let's say it adds "character" to the experience. And always, ALWAYS check the door.
Any tips for surviving a big group vacation like this?
Oh, honey, surviving a vacation with four groups? That's a sport in itself. Here's the survival guide:
- Embrace the Chaos: Seriously. There *will* be disagreements. There *will* be lost luggage. There *will* be someone who "accidentally" eats all the snacks. Just breathe. It's part of the fun (kinda).
- Delegate: Divide and conquer. Assign meal prep, dishwashing, and grocery shopping tasks. Otherwise, you'll end up doing everything, and that's a one-way ticket to burnout.
- Learn the Art of the "Quiet Corner": Find a spot where you can escape the madness. A balcony, a hammock, a good book, anything! You need your alone time.
- Compromise. But not always: Make sure you get what you want out of the vacation. You can't please everyone. And don't be afraid to say "no" to the things that make you miserable.
- BYOB (Bring Your Own Sanity!): Seriously. Pack your favorite wine, your coping mechanisms (yoga, meditation, excessive napping), and a healthy dose of humor. You'll need it. Especially with the in-laws. 😉
- And remember to take pictures! Even the disasters. They make for the best stories later. You'll laugh about it… eventually (maybe).
Would you go back?
Would I? Hmm. That's a good question. After all the craziness... Despite the buffet's inconsistencies, the sauna's "peculiarities", the balcony's potential for drama, and the sheer logistical nightmare of coordinating four groups...
...yes. Absolutely. Because amidst the chaos, the squabbles, and the occasional burnt fish, there were those golden moments. The belly laughs. The shared sunsets. The memories we made, good, bad, and hilariously awful.
So, yes. I'd go back. Just... maybe I'd bring a bigger bag of snacks. And a very, VERY long extension cord for the phone charger.
